Top 11 signs you might be a lame duck.

11. Even Tony Blair stops taking your calls.

10. You see the dark side of John Bolton.

9. You seem to be able to ride your bicycle whenever you want.

8. Wall Street lobbyists contribute millions you to get you to stop pushing 'Private Accounts.'

7. Enthusiasm for your impeachment wanes.

6. Christian fundamentalists countenance (say 'whatever' to) appearance of pornographic actress at your fundraiser.

5. Even Jeff Gannon stops taking your calls.

4. Shit starting to stick.

3. "Freedom Fries" congressman Walter Jones seeks distance.

2. John McCain stops kissing your ass.

1. Old Secret Service Code name: 'Timberwolf.'
New Secret Service name: 'Lame Duck.'

Index