Top 11 reasons the U.S. still holds Saddam Hussein after ceding legal custody to Iraq.

1. The document that the U.S. signed can't talk.

2. Dubya still studying Dad's game films of the Lee Harvey Oswald prison transfer.

3. Iraq not lawyered-up enough to end-run Geneva Conventions.

4. Might need him to "escape" for the political bounce of capturing him again.

5. Practical joke on the provisional government; it's only one of Saddam's dopplegangers!

6. Because we can.

7. Both countries are trying to be understanding about the difficulties a custody fight can cause a dictator.

8. Totalitarian courtesy.

9. It's like any other bad relationship, you can't bear the thought of someone else having him.

10. Dubya put Hussein's pistol up for bid on eBay, wants new souvenir.

11. Ask Manuel Noriega ... Oh, that's right, you can't.

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